1. Big companies don't do business via chain letters.
 Bill Gates is not giving you $1000, and Disney is not
 giving you a free vacation. There is no baby food
 company issuing class-action checks. Procter and
 Gamble is not part of a satanic cult or scheme,
 and its logo is not satanic. MTV will not give you
 backstage passes if you forward something to the most
 people. You can relax; there is no need to pass it on
 "just in case it's true". Furthermore, just because
 someone said in a message, four generations back, that
 "we checked it out and it's legit", does not actually
 make it true.

 2. There is no kidney theft ring in New Orleans. No
 one is waking up in a bathtub full of ice, even if a
 friend of a friend swears it happened to their cousin.
If you are hell-bent on believing the kidney-theft
 ring stories, please see:
 http://urbanlegends.tqn.com/library/weekly/aa062997.htm 
 And I quote: "The National Kidney Foundation has
 repeatedly issued requests for actual victims of organ
 thieves to come forward and tell their stories. None
 have." That's "none" as in "zero". Not even your
 friend's cousin.

 3. Neiman Marcus doesn't really sell a $200 cookie
>recipe. And even if they do, we all have it. And even
 if you don't, you can get a copy at:
  
 Then, if you make the recipe, decide the cookies are
 that awesome, feel free to pass the recipe on.

 4. If the latest NASA rocket disaster(s) DID contain
 plutonium that went to particulate over the eastern
 seaboard, do you REALLY think this information would
 reach the public via an AOL chainletter?

 5. There is no "Good Times" virus. In fact, you
 should never, ever, ever forward any email containing
 any virus warning unless you first confirm that an
 actual site of an actual company that actually deals
 with viruses. Try: http://www.norton.com 
 And even then, don't forward it. We don't care. And
 you cannot get a virus from a flashing IM or email,
 you have to download....ya know, like, a FILE!
> >>
6. There is no gang initiation plot to murder any
 motorist who flashes headlights at another car driving
at night without lights.

7. If you're using Outlook, IE, or Netscape to write
email, turn off the "HTML encoding." Those of us on
 Unix shells can't read it, and don't care enough to
 save the attachment and then view it with a web
browser, since you're probably forwarding us a copy of
 the Neiman Marcus Cookie Recipe anyway.

 8. If you still absolutely MUST forward that
10th-generation message from a friend, at least have
 the decency to trim the eight miles of headers showing
 everyone else who's received it over the last 6
 months. It sure wouldn't hurt to get rid of all the
 ">" that begin each line either. Besides, if it has
 gone around that many times we've probably already
 seen it.

9. Craig Shergold (or Sherwood, or Sherman, etc.) in
 England is not dying of cancer or anything else at
this time and would like everyone to stop sending him
 their business cards. He apparently is no longer a
 "little boy" either.

 10. The "Make a Wish" foundation is a real
 organization doing fine work, but they have had to
 establish a special toll free hot line in response to
 the large number of Internet hoaxes using their good
name and reputation. It is distracting them from the
important work they do.

 11. If you are one of those insufferable idiots who
 forwards anything that "promises" something bad will
 happen if you "don't," then something bad will happen
 to you if I ever meet you in a dark alley.
> >>
 12. Women really are suffering in Afghanistan, and PBS
 and NEA funding are still vulnerable to attack
 (although not at the present time) but forwarding an
 e-mail won't help either cause in the least. If you
 want to help, contact your local legislative
 representative, or get in touch with Amnesty
 International or the Red Cross. As a general rule,
 e-mail "signatures" are easily faked and mean nothing
 to anyone with any power to do anything about whatever
 the competition is complaining about.

(P.S.: There is no bill pending before Congress that
 will allow long-distance companies to charge you for
 using the Internet. But you are being taxed for it on your phone
bill.)

 Bottom Line... composing e-mail or posting something
 on the Net is as easy as writing on the walls of a
 public restroom. Don't automatically believe it until
 it's proven false... ASSUME it's false, unless there
 is proof that it's true.