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We are NutzWorld. Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated. |
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10 Ways to Make Your Neighbors Move
Order pizza and other food to
their house and pick it up at their doorstep claiming that you don't
have a phone.
Stand over the plants in your yard with a hose and Scream, "I have your life in my hands, bow down to me!". Then point at each one and declare them good or bad plants, while watering the bad ones.
Bring them restraining orders on
inanimate objects in their house. (i.e., chairs, books, lamps, etc.)
Ask them if you can put your
trash in their cans, if they ask why say, "Mine are full of
bodies", then stutter and say, "I uh mean other
garbage." Walk away laughing hysterically.
Patrol the perimeter of your
yard while carrying a broom. If they come close state that there is a
3 foot neutral area between the two yards.
At night transplant the plants
in their garden. In the morning say, "looks like they're on the
move again."
When they're watching TV, pull a
lawn chair behind their window. Sit down with popcorn and a drink and
ask them if they could open a window so you can hear too.
Build snowmen with name tags of
your neighbors. Each day hack off a different part of their body.
Use your TV remote to change the
channels on their TV from outside. If asked why, say you protest such
programs. (The more educational the program the better.)
Dig shallow graves at night filling your yard with brown grave patches. Make markers out of household appliances.