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Puns 1-5

Two fishermen sitting in a kayak were chilly, but when they lit a fire in the craft it sank-proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it, too

Two boll weevils grew up in South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and became a famous actor. The other stayed behind in the cotton fields and never amounted to much. The second one, naturally, became known as the lesser of two weevils

A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He sidles up to the bar and announces: 

"I'm looking for the man who shot my paw. " 

A neutron goes into a bar and asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?" 

The bartender replies, "For you, no charge."

Two atoms are walking down the street and they run in to each other. 

One says to the other, "Are you all right?" 

"No, I lost an electron!" 

"Are you sure?" 

"Yeah, I'm positive!"

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