Worst Actress
Anne Heche, "Marin Frist", Men in Trees (With a voice that sounds like
she's been sucking helium, coupled with her frenetic acting style, Heche's
performance made me want to take a sedative.)
Best Actress
Vanessa Williams, "Wilhelmina Slater", Ugly Betty (Well, yes, she's a
cartoon character, but Williams' deliciously evil Wilhelmina kept me watching
after Betty's quality began to slide.)
Most Overrated Female
Eva Longoria, "Gabrielle Solis", Desperate Housewives (Though a competent
actress, Longoria does not deserve the accolades that have been heaped upon
her.)
Most Overlooked Female
Tracie Thoms, "Kat Miller", Cold Case (As the token black female and one
of only two female homicide detectives - endlessly pointed out on the show -
Thoms' performance demands more.)
Worst Actor
Mandy Patinkin, "Jason Gideon", Criminal Minds (He always looked - and
often acted - stoned and disengaged. After dramatically mumbling some sage
advice, his character did little. Patinkin did less.)
Best Actor
James Spader, "Alan Shore", Boston Legal (Though a bit of a caricature,
Spader always delivered his lines with the appropriate amount of sarcasm and
wit.)
Most Overrated Male
Matthew Fox, "Jack Shephard", Lost (Oh, puhleeze. Fox's stilted and
overly-dramatic performance on Lost was almost to the point of hilarity.
Depending far too much on his looks, Fox needs some genuine emotion
behind his overwrought emoting.)
Most Overlooked Male
Wallace Langham, "Hodges", CSI (Though it's always hard for a large
ensemble drama to give peripheral characters screen time, Langham's "Hodges"
went from an annoying know-it-all to an interesting study in insecurity and now
we need more.)
Worst-Dressed Female
Jennifer Love Hewitt, "Melinda Gordon", Ghost Whisperer (Okay, we get it
already: Jennifer Love Hewitt has impressive cleavage. Enough with the
ever-present plunging necklines.)
Best-Dressed Females
Entire cast of Desperate Housewives (Though I don't understand how a
suburban housewife - no matter how financially stable - could wear a different
outfit every single day, the cast of Housewives were always
dressed wonderfully and appropriately,)
Worst-Dressed Male
Donald Trump, The Apprentice (A little variety in the zillion-dollar
suits would work wonders for Trump and his tired show. And that hair...oh, that
hair... Trump's signature bad hair is just not cute anymore. He needs a
stylist.)
Best-Dressed Male
Hugh Laurie "Gregory House", House (Untidy shirt, jeans, sneakers...the
scruffy look just works for him.)
Worst TV Mom
"Angela Petrelli", Cristine Rose, Heroes (So ambitious that she didn't
care about anyone: her sons, her granddaughter...no one. Mother from hell.)
Best TV Mom
"Gail Green", Pamela Reed, Jericho (A clever balance between being a mom
to everyone and being a strong, independent woman. It made her obnoxious
attitude to her son's girlfriend most jarring.)
Worst TV Dad
"Sebastian Shark", James Woods, Shark (Not much of a father at all,
actually. His daughter is more like a parent than he is.)
Best TV Dad
"Brad Chase", Mark Valley, Boston Legal (Easy to dismiss as just another
pretty boy, the combination of worry, fear, concern and genuine elation at the
birth of his child made Valley's "Brad" utterly charming.)
Worst TV Kid
"Matthew Campbell,", Hamish Linklater, The New Adventures of Old Christine
(Though rarely seen - thank goodness - the kid didn't seem to have any
personality at all, making his appearances on the show stop it dead.)
Best TV Kid
"Justin Suarez", Mark Indelicato, Ugly Betty (I've always been partial to
young people brave enough to be exactly who they are, despite what anyone
thinks.)
Least Likable Character on a Show
"Jack Shephard", Matthew Fox, Lost ("Jack" needs to get over himself.)
Most Likable Character on a Show
"Hiro Nakamura", Masi Oka, Heroes (Cast as the comic relief, "Hiro" has
proven to be so much more.)
Worst Drama Shark (James Woods' stilted one-note performance, stupid dialogue, weird
father-daughter relationship...it all adds up to a show not worth watching.)
Best Drama Cold Case (Despite having far too many cases barely cool, this is still a
great show. If they'd get back to doing cases more than five years old, it would
be an excellent show.)
Worst Sitcom The Class (I can see wanting to reunite with high school pals. Or even
junior high pals. But third grade?!?! I can barely remember who was in my third
grade class, never mind have a burning desire to see them again. Oh, and The
Class just wasn't funny.)
Best Sitcom My Name is Earl (It would be so easy for this show to go stale very
quickly, but season 2 still managed to keep its decidedly un-PC tone and be
funny at the same time.)
Worst SciFi
There was really only one SciFi series on network television (Heroes),
and it was actually good. Thank goodness for cable.
Best...er only SciFi Heroes
Worst Animated Series Creature Comforts (I didn't get this...was it supposed to be funny?
Serious? Sarcastic? Whatever it was supposed to be, it wasn't.)
Best Animated Series Simpsons
Worst Commercial
Head On (We all know this one: "apply directly to the forehead...apply directly
to the forehead". Not content to be plain irritating, Head On then hired the
Worst Actors In The World to tell us how annoying the commercial is, making it
even more annoying. And I still don't know what Head On is, exactly... just that
you repeatedly apply it directly to the forehead.)
Best Commercial
Sobeys' "Lost in the grocery store" (Poking fun at big box stores like Costco,
the couple lost in the grocery store needing the GPS to find the produce ["turn
right at aisle 176"... they are at aisle 3] was one of only a precious few that
I remember. And like.)
Most Overrated Series The Office (This show is lame and dull, but it's hard to tell if it's the
comparison to the superior British version, or that this one is just bad.
Whatever. It sucks.)
Most Overlooked Series Day Break (Different and entertaining, this "replacement series" for when
Lost was on hiatus, was abruptly canceled a few episodes in.)
Worst Writing Crossing Jordan (Not only was much of the dialogue laughable, it was
predictable. I started playing a game of "finish the sentence before they say
it". I won every time.)
Best Writing Studio 60 (Poor Studio 60...a TV show about TV writers had the
best writing. Too bad nobody was watching.)
Worst Host/Narrator
Ryan Seacrest, American Idol (I don't know what it was, but Seacrest just
seemed to get more and more stupid every time I watched Idol.)
Best Host/Narrator
Jeff Probst, Survivor (Not because he's an especially outstanding host,
but the fact that he can put up with the weirdos and make increasingly stale
material sound fresh and new gives him a gold star...er, Immunity Idol.)
Worst Newscaster/Reporter
Stone Phillips, Dateline (Thank goodness he's leaving Dateline.
Maybe they'll find someone that can actually look directly in the camera and not
be such a drama queen.)
Best Newscaster/Reporter
John Stossel, 20/20 (Stossel is one of the few journalists that doesn't
take himself so damn seriously and has the guts to poke fun at both himself and
the media.)
Worst News Magazine Dateline (This just keeps winning the category. There really aren't any
more bad - never mind good - things to say about this poor excuse for a news
magazine.)
Best News Magazine 60 Minutes
Worst Reality Show Series The Real Wedding Crashers (The worst Candid Camera knockoff I've
ever seen. Some of the "set-ups" were spectacularly stupid and unfunny.)
Best Reality Show Series Supernanny (Not only does Supernanny satisfy the voyeur in all of
us, it's easy to feel like The Best Parent in the World compared to those
clueless parents and their wild, ill-mannered brats.)
Worst Reality Game Pirate Master (In this ridiculous Survivor on a Ship, the first
contestant to be captain went through some weird personality change, taking the
role of captain waaaaay too seriously. The second to play captain started
speaking in a spectacularly bad accent - supposedly British - for no apparent
reason. I stopped watching this gang of weirdos after that.)
Runner-up On the Lot (In the first three weeks, the host changed once, six
contestants vanished without explanation and the format changed so many times it
wound up with no set format at all. Whew! Proves that dropping Directing God's
name, "Steven Spielberg", a gazillion times an episode can't save a TV show, no
matter how good. Which this wasn't.)
Best Reality Game The Amazing Race (Okay, the "Family Edition" is done. "All-Stars"? Check.
Now just get back to the good ol' Race we know and love. If Race
comes out with a "Celebrity Edition" it's off the list for good...I can only
overlook so much.)
Worst Reality Villains
Dustin Konzelman and Kandice Pelletier, aka "The Beauty Queens", Amazing
Race: All-Stars (Obnoxious liars who couldn't run a clean race in a washing
machine, these two were an embarrassment to the states they represented in
beauty pageants. You couldn't even love to hate them...you just hated them.)
Best Reality Villain
For the first time, there weren't any. The "villains" were so obviously playing
that role (other than the naturally vile Beauty Queens from The Amazing Race),
it made them bad actors, not good villains.
Worst Game Show National Bingo Night (Um...huh? Whose dumb idea was this?)
Best Game Show Jeopardy
Worst Score Lost (Though I didn't even watch half of this season, what I watched had
music that was more dramatic than the show.)
Best Score Cold Case (Always fits with the story and timeframe. Now if only the
tunes were older. Hint, hint. Hint hint hint hint...)
Worst Theme Music The Loop (This series didn't last long, and it's no wonder. The loud,
off-key [no key?] theme song was tantamount to nails on a chalkboard.)
Best Theme Music Law & Order (Still and forever.)
Worst Newcomer (that hasn't been canceled) Brothers and Sisters (Yawwwwwwwwn.)
Best Newcomer (that hasn't been canceled) Heroes (Despite its unevenness and vanishing off the airwaves for a
while, this was still the most original and entertaining series of the season.)
Biggest Decline in Quality 24 (With so many to choose from - ER, Lost, Law & Order:
Criminal Intent, to name but a few - this was a most difficult choice. 24
takes it because last season was the best ever. This season? The worst by far.)
Most Improved in Quality
For the first time, not a single show improved in quality...not even the
newcomers. Is this the end of network television?
Worst Network
NBC (You know a network is tanking when it resorts to selling punchlines to
one-liners at 99 cents a pop [Last Comic Standing].)
Best Network
CBS
Biggest Stinker of the Season The Black Donnellys (Tough decision this year, with so many to choose
from like Traveler, 20 Good Years, The Class, Six
Degrees, etc. etc., but Donnellys was the stinkiest of the stinky.)
Trend of the Year
The Hiatus (I've always passionately detested mid-season reruns, but remove the
show all together? More detestable. That has to be the dumbest idea the networks
have ever had. If the networks would just look at the ratings that reruns garner
and - once and for all - realize viewers have short attention spans, they would
never have put anything on hiatus. Off the air, out of mind, unlikely to return.
Get it? Morons.)
Least Magical Moments
The "miniature killer" storyline on CSI. The first few were interesting,
to be sure. But by stretching it out for the entire season, it became a big, fat
"whatever" by the time the season finale aired.
Most Magical Moment
The mass exodus of Gregory House's (Hugh Laurie) staff on the season-ender of
House. It will be interesting to see what happens next season
We
would love to know what you think, sound off on the
TV message
boards and let us know what you think!
