Rachael Kirkconnell met Matt James during season 25 of The Bachelor and in the aftermath of the show, their relationship was full of ups and downs.
While the 2021 season of the ABC series was airing, the Georgia native came under fire for resurfaced photos in an antebellum-style dress at a fraternity getaway. Before Kirkconnell addressed the pics, then-host Chris Harrison came to her defense during an interview with alum Rachel Lindsay, asking the audience to have “grace” for the contestant, who he knew ended up winning the season. (The scandal broke in February 2021, one month before the finale aired.)
The situation resulted in James breaking up with Kirkconnell ahead of the After the Final Rose special that March. While the twosome reconciled later that year, the network cut ties with Harrison and alum Jesse Palmer took over the gig.
Kirkconnell released her first statement on February 11, 2021, writing via Instagram that her actions were “not acceptable” and her “ignorance was racist.” During a candid conversation with fellow season 25 star Bri Springs, who finished as the second runner-up on James’ season, in October 2022, Kirkconnell said her initial apology “backfired” and claimed the show “pushed” her to write the statement.
Kirkconnell recalled going “rogue” and doing a second, lengthy apology video after James ended their relationship because she had nothing to lose. She shared a third statement when her followers started to come for Lindsay and James instead of focusing on her mistakes.
After reuniting in spring 2021, James wrote a book about his time as the first Black Bachelor, criticizing the series for what they opted to air. While speaking about their relationship with the franchise in July 2022, Kirkconnell told Us that the couple are rooting for everyone from “afar.”
Despite saying he had plans to propose in the future, James announced their split via Instagram in 2025.
Keep scrolling for more of Kirkconnell’s comments about her time on the show:
Rachael ‘Spiraled’ During Fantasy Suite Dates
“I definitely spiraled during fantasy suites,” she told Springs, comparing herself to Susie Evans on Clayton Echard’s season. “I think they purposely held me last to, like, make me go crazy and they did a great job. I went crazy. I was, like, so not OK — running on three hours asleep, you know, locked away in a room. You’re left with no one but yourself and your thoughts.”
Producers Hoped Matt Picked a Woman of Color
Both Springs and Kirkconnell claimed that they were under the impression the show was hoping James would end up with a Black woman as the first Black Bachelor.
“Talking with Matt about it — they did do, like, probably everything they could to to get us to not be together because they didn’t want us to be together,” Kirkconnell claimed. “I mean, obviously, I have Matt to thank for even just being together at this point because he just put his foot down and he was like, ‘This is what works, this is who I want to be with and sorry … like, go back home and write your storyboard.’ Because he did say, ‘As soon as I knew, I let them know because I knew that they were going to have to make it work.’ … The finale, when we were wrapping filming up — you guys, it’s hilarious. They couldn’t have been more disappointed. He handed me that final rose and as we’re, like, doing our final interview, they’re literally breaking apart the set. Not one single person, like, came and was like, ‘Congrats or I’m happy for you guys.’ Didn’t even say bye. There were people that I spent two months with that packed it up and were like, ‘We failed. Failure of a season and it hadn’t even aired yet.’ That’s what it felt like.”
While she acknowledged that the series may have wanted to help with diversity with Matt’s season, she added: “Sadly, I also think it wasn’t for Matt, it wasn’t for any person of color, it was for themselves to try and monetize off of, like, what was happening in the world and they obviously didn’t do a great job with it.”
The ‘After the Final Rose’ Tension With Matt
“Matt, no joke, took, like, 10 minutes to answer each question,” Kirkconnell said, reflecting on how ABC opted not to make their AFR live. “Probably just because he was trying to figure out the perfect things to say because he was under so much pressure. … If you watch it back, I’m, like, trying to comfort him, like, ‘Matt, just say something.’ And then he’s like, pulling away because he’s like, ‘You can’t touch me right now, I hate you.’”
While Kirkconnell said anyone who thought James was “disgusted” by her is wrong, she also denied that they were faking anything.
“People were like, ‘They faked breaking up.’ … He dumped me,” she said.
Her Conversation with Michelle Young
Kirkconnell explained that she and James’ runner-up (and season 18 lead) Young had a candid conversation about The Bachelor’s audience during AFR, citing the difference in social media followings and ratings.
“Talking about the audience itself and she was like, ‘How crazy is it that everything that happened this season with you and with the host and everyone, like, you still have all of these followers, you still have all of these supporters. You still have people defending you.’ … Everyone else in the top five was [biracial] … and she was basically saying, ‘We’re not even at level you are and why do you think that is?’” Kirkconnell said. “She was basically saying it’s the audience. … ‘This entire audience of the show is some type of way. … Not only are they following you and defending you and supporting you, but they don’t even have the decency to, like, support us.’”
Not Wanting Chris Harrison’s Defense
“I didn’t even know he was doing that interview. My phone was blowing up like everyone else’s. … I had no idea. … The ignorant side of me wants to be, like, ‘It’s because I was the final one and he was trying to save, like, the fact that we were together,’” Kirkconnell said of why Harrison spoke out at the time. “If he would have cut [himself] short right then and there, said the one sentence like, ‘Let’s just let them have their time.’ He could have ended it like that. But obviously, that wasn’t the case because of everything else that was said afterward. So it’s not the reason.”
Discussing an Engagement on the Show
James and Kirkconnell did not leave his season of The Bachelor engaged — and it was a discussion they had during fantasy suites.
“We had a conversation off camera about not getting engaged. I knew that was coming. I didn’t know if the show would convince him that he needed to do it or that he realized he should do it,” Kirkconnell recalled during her January 2025 “Call Her Daddy” podcast appearance. “I told myself like if it were to happen, I would say yes, but I didn’t expect it to happen.”
She continued, “I think that we were both worried about production having like little tricks up their sleeve, which ended up, you know, us not getting our final date. I remember Chris Harrison showing up to my door telling me that Matt’s really confused and he doesn’t wanna see me.”
Kirkconnell recalled going from laughing to having “a meltdown” because she suddenly felt “insecure” about a proposal, or lack thereof.
“It was a really heavy feeling on the day. But I knew, yeah, I mean as soon as he said he couldn’t propose, it was one of those things where I was like, not disappointed, but I just was thinking like, ‘OK, you’re not proposing but are we still gonna be together?’” she explained. “When he was like, ‘I still want to be with you, I want to try this out in the real world.’ I was excited. … They were literally breaking down the set as we were still doing like our final, they were done. … I felt like a failure because they didn’t get an engagement out of it.”