A cannabis-infused date night turned into a missing person’s case for Kelly Stafford’s Elf on the Shelf.
After a night out with her husband, Matthew Stafford, Kelly, 34, explained what happened to her family’s elf named Sugar Plum, who is supposed to be moved to a new location in the Staffords’ home every night to surprise the couple’s four daughters in the morning.
“We have date nights on Monday,” Kelly said Thursday, December 5 on her “The Morning After” podcast. “We went on our date night. We came home. I was like, ‘I gotta move Sugar Plum,’ but I was also a little high. Me and Matthew had some cocktails. I had had some weed. And you know, we were in a good place.”
She added, “Maybe not to move Sugar Plum, though.”
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The next day, one of the couple’s daughters sent Kelly into a spiral. Kelly and Matthew, quarterback for the Los Angeles Rams, share twins Sawyer and Chandler, 7, Hunter, 6, and Tyler, 4.
“Sawyer comes in this morning and I’m going, ‘Shit. Sugar Plum. We didn’t move her,’” Kelly recalled. “I looked at Matthew. I was like, ‘Stay here.’ I run downstairs to the spot where she was the day before and she’s not there.”
Kelly continued, “I was like, ‘Either this elf is real and f—ing moved itself, or I moved it and don’t remember.’”
The mom of four said she was “panicked” and was forced to admit to herself, “I have no idea where this f—ing elf is.”
Fortunately for Sugar Plum — and Kelly’s sanity — she was able to put the pieces of the mystery together when she brought the dilemma up to her husband.
“I looked at Matthew and go, ‘Do you remember moving the elf?’” she recounted. “He looked at me dead and goes, ‘Yes, I moved the elf.’”
She said, “He moved it. He was the responsible one.”
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When it comes to actually moving Sugar Plum to new locations, Kelly said she’s not interested in going the creative extra mile.
“I am not the person who is setting up the bubbles in the sink where [the elf] is taking a bath,” she ranted. “They do all this bulls—. I’m sorry, the elf gets way too much f—ing credit when it is us.”
Kelly acknowledged that Sugar Plum’s travels are of great joy to her kids, so she’ll keep up with the charade — but she’s not thrilled about it.
“It’s so cute how they get excited for this stuff, it really is,” she said. “But, and there’s a big f—ing but, I f—ing hate that thing.”